Cleanse

You see me as this awesome person, whose hurt and damaged 

You don’t place blame on me like you should and think me to be perfect 

You praise me for the “awesome girlfriend ” you think I was

But you’ve got it all wrong

Yes I loved you, but I didn’t communicate with you 

I wasn’t very patient and offered little understanding 

The truth is 

You were too good for me and better than I ever deserved 

Maybe that’s why I lost you 

Maybe that’s why we weren’t forever 

Maybe that’s why I’m stuck in a series of shitty partners 

Maybe that’s why even though I know your happy a part of me weeps because in your happiness comes my loneliness 

I get it now

You are my forever and that means my punishment is being lonely 

Living out my days defined by my accomplishments 

I know now what the path is that lies before me

As usual I understand and accept….it’s what I do best

I just needed to cleanse myself of misconceptions and falsehoods and expose myself for what I know to be truth.

Maybe in another life I’m happy and positive and we actually get to be 

Because in this life the stars have not aligned for it to be so.